Let’s face it. It’s hard being self-employed.

And, while there are a ton of great things that come with the territory (helloooo, flexible schedule and no boss!), there are also plenty of not-so-great things.

For example: it’s easy to get distracted from achieving your dreams. Whether it’s by you—yourself, your clients, or even your family and friends.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could:

Gain focus
Set boundaries
And earn the respect you deserve?

Here’s the secret: you can!

It’s just a matter of shifting your mindset, taking control of your business, and embracing your very own badassery.

How can you do that?

It’s pretty simple, actually.

Get out your #2 pencil and notebook, ‘cuz I’m about to blow your mind with this super-scientific (haha) three-step system.

You gotta:

Train Yourself
Train Your Clients
And Train Your Family & Friends

But, before we get to that, you’ve got to understand that:

So often, we get in our own way.

We get scared. We don’t feel like we know what we’re doing. We’re unsure of ourselves and how we’re conducting business.

And that can really make or break your business.

So, HOW do you get out of your own way?

HOW do you find the confidence to keep focused and stay the course?

First, you’ve gotta:

Train Yourself

You come first. Because you can’t train anyone else until you, yourself, are trained.

Get Educated

Start with getting educated. SO many of us have a great idea—or we’re good at our niche, yet we don’t have a clue as to the business side of things. So, dive deep into business practices, industry standards, and legal rights. Tap into both local and national resources. Learn ALL of the things so you can be empowered in your own business.

(In Kansas City? Check out The Freelance Exchange! You can also check out the Freelance Rockstars group on Facebook, which is open to anyone around the world.)

Create Policies & Procedures

Next, you’ll want to create policies and procedures … and then stick to them! For example, you may come up with policies for things such as:

Office hours
Contracts & deposits
Payment terms, fees, non-payment

The cool thing about being self-employed is that YOU get to determine all of these things.

So, if you don’t want to take a meeting after hours, you don’t have to … or you can charge extra. If you have a policy that requires a client sign a contract up front before starting work, you don’t have to work with someone if they’re not willing to sign it. And if your payment terms are 30 days, that means that your invoices are due within 30 days—NOT when the client feels it’s convenient to pay you.

Set Boundaries

Lastly, set boundaries for yourself. That means being ready for anything by being both proactive AND reactive. For example, have those policies figured out, put them in writing, and be prepared to have that discussion upfront. Plan in advance how you’ll handle certain situations (like late or non-payment) so you’ll be ready for different scenarios. Don’t be afraid to over communicate these things … and be prepared to stand your ground.

Here’s the deal. You’ve got to:

If you want to be taken seriously, you’ve GOT to take this business stuff seriously. If you want to command respect as a business owner, you have to earn it.

Once you’ve got yourself trained, then you can …

Train Your Clients

Next, you train your clients.

Because people will walk all over you if you let them.

Don’t let them.

Communicate Thoroughly

Define expectations, and get every pertinent detail in writing.

For example … those office hours you set for yourself when you trained yourself? Share those with your client. This will let them know when they can contact you, when they can expect a response from you, when they can expect you to be working, when they can schedule a meeting, and so on. (Note: if they ask you to do work or to meet with them after hours, they’ll know they’re imposing … and you can charge extra if you agree to do it.) An onboarding packet or welcome/what-to-expect letter is great for this sort of thing!

Whatever you do, put everything in writing. Inform them of things like:

Your payment terms
When payment is due
Late fees, rush fees, cancellation fees, etc.
Non-payment procedures: collections, attorney, court, etc.

All of this ought to go in your contract, anyway, yet additionally pointing it out is also helpful.

Instill Boundaries

Ya’ know, those ones you set for yourself previously? Now, you’ve got to uphold them.

For example, you may have a policy surrounding client/contractor communications, such as, “Client may communicate with the contractor via in-person meetings, Zoom calls, phone calls, or email (preferred).” Then, if the client attempts to contact you about work via social media, texting, or any third-party app, you’ll know to put the kibash on that instantly.

Get comfy saying no. If a client is doing something that goes against your wishes, your policies and/or your procedures, you have every right to nip that in the bud. Remember to trust your gut. If something feels wrong, it probably is.

And that’s where you regain your power.

Have a game plan in place.

And walk away if necessary.

Remember, it’s about commanding the respect you deserve. And getting there means having the difficult conversations up front.

What’s left? You’ve got to …

Train Your Family and Friends

That’s right! Last, but not least, you’ve got to train your family and friends.

This is one thing that’s so often overlooked yet, if you want to keep interruptions at bay, you’ll need to also set boundaries (and stick to them!) with your loved ones.

Share Your Office Hours

Tell your family and friends when you’ll be working and ask them to them to leave you alone during those hours (unless it’s an emergency, of course). You may put a sign on the door to your office or give them some sort of visual clue to let them know.

Advise partners or roommates that chores, errands, etc., will be done at a later time … just not during working hours. The same goes for social activities.

Set Expectations

Once you tell your loved ones this, now you’ve got to abide by the rules in order to enforce them. That means, during office hours:

Don’t answer texts, messages, calls, etc., unless urgent.
Don’t go to happy hours, movies, play dates, etc.
Don’t do chores, run errands, etc.

You have to train people how to treat you. And they’ll learn based upon what you’ll allow.

Uphold Boundaries

You may need to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your friends and family. Be gentle, yet firm. Explain that you’re working—and you expect to be treated just like any other person with a traditional full-time job. Ask them to treat you the same way: not to bother you or expect things during the workday.

At the end of the day, people will try and distract you from achieving your dreams—whether intentionally or not.

Remember: Don’t let them.

Use the above simple three-step system to:

Train Yourself
Train Your Clients
Train Your Family & Friends

… so you can get in the right mindset, be prepared for whatever might come your way, and embrace badassery for the ultimate freelance success.

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Need help with anything? Let me know. And remember, one-on-one coaching is available!

Embrace Badassery to Find the Ultimate Freelance Success